Master Chef Jr.

❤ these kids.   I really ❤ them.  I’m amazed at all the talent in the kitchen.  Adorable too.  Jasmine’s oysters – yummy.  Syd got the gross giblets and turned them into BBQ. Rooting for Gonzalo.  He shared his flour.  They’re competing but they still help each other too.  ❤️ and why am I 😢.  They’re family forever!  That’s why!

As always, more to come.  


This Week’s Lessons From TV 

I love all art forms. Many would argue TV is not one of them.  I disagree.  And certain sitcom writers may too as evidenced by the close of American Housewife  … 

Katie: “Do you wanna just watch TV instead?” 

Greg: “That’s a really good idea. TV is just better entertainment”. 

Katie: “It really is!”

I expected the season finale of This Is Us to be that for me last night but it wasn’t.  What a let down! … and this from one of the show’s biggest fans.  I guess topping Memphis and What Now? proved too difficult.  

I knew we wouldn’t find out how Jack died … too soon and an accident going to Rebecca’s show too predictable. While I appreciated seeing  more of Jack’s and Rebecca’s pasts and finding out how they met, I missed the multiple story lines going at once.  Even Jack’s speech at the end didn’t give me the knockdown ugly cry punch of the two prior episodes. 

Then today I’m catching up on what I recorded.  While watching the Real O’Neal’s, the tears finally came. Partially because I am overly emotional and needed a good cry. But also in laughter there was truth.  And truth can be moving.  

Clive proposes to Eileen.  He equates his time with the family to joining the circus.  He’s funny. It’s relatable.  Many families have a circus theme.  Shannon is the ring master, Pat the lion, Jimmy the clown, Jody tickets and promotions and Eileen the acrobat. 

Clive: “Kenny is of course the bearded lady.”

Kenny: “That’s offensive but honestly I’m just glad I’m not tickets and promotions”

Eileen’s response hit close to home.  

“For so long I’ve been worried about doing the right thing and what other people think. I’ve lived by those rules and look where it’s gotten me. I’m on a new adventure now and while it’s not one I’ve chosen, I want to see where it takes me.”

Relatable right?  To a myriad of issues.  My new adventure is the empty nest.  What’s yours?  I hope you have an adventure you’re living because YOU deserve the best. 

What really got to me though was Jimmy’s college essay.   Paraphrased here:

A lot can happen to a family in a year. They can get divorced but grow closer.  They can find what makes them happy even if it’s weird. They can find joy in completely unexpected moments. And they can stand up for what they believe in even if it’s scary.

Wow! Pass the tissues.  

As always, more to come.  

I Get My Best Inspiration From Sit-Coms

The Great Indoors starring the talk soup guy had the best millennial comeback “Don’t forget my generation is only like this because of the bad parenting of your generation”

Yep.  This is another if only post.  If only, I knew then what I know now.  If only, I had a second chance.  If only, I could forgive myself for all my wrongs.

Damn empty nest full of regret. The weather today is affecting my mood.  I’d swear I have seasonal depression but supposedly I live too far from the equator.  Rainy mood on this rainy day.

For the past few Saturdays, there has been a “crisis” of some sort for Lulu.  I am powerless to help being geographically separated.  Then I think maybe that is really for best because how else will she adapt and grow?  She will figure things out.  At least I hope she will figure things out.  Yet Hope can be like Karma – two bitches!!!

Last night, coming down from the “crisis”, our hope sparkled conversation went something like this:

Me: “You know you have nothing to prove right?  No one decides their life’s profession in 2nd grade.  If the course work is not what you thought and/or something you don’t like, change your major.”

Lulu: “I know but I have not changed my mind.”

Me: “Remember I told you about my friend who’s daughter was going to major in math just like she did and become an actuary. After one semester she was miserable and switched.  She never looked back is very successful in her chosen field.”

Lulu: “I remember!  How could I forget?!??  Repeat Polly!!! Stop trying to change my mind would you?  Things are hard enough.  I just miss you guys and can’t wait to be home for Spring Break.”

Me: “Okay I’ll quit.  And I’m not trying to change your mind.  I just don’t want you to make choices based on what you think WE want.  This is YOUR life.”

Lulu: “I know, you’re a broken record mom!  Remember, those things they had in the 70s or 80s … before I was even born.”

Me: “That’s my girl! Sarcasm will take you far :).  I just don’t like it when you are so upset.  If things are so bad away at school, do you want to come home next semester?  You can always finish school from here.”

Lulu: “No, I will just plan better for next semester so I do not have any more nights like this.”

Me: “Well alrighty then.”

As always, more to come.


Life Imitates Art

Or is it the other way around?!?

I’ve been feeling pretty puny these last few days … was running a temperature on New Year’s Day and just when I thought I couldn’t take the sore throat anymore the scratchiness went away.   Suffice it to say I’m almost back to the land of the living.

While I was sick, I  lounged around watching TV … feeling sorry for myself. I cleared out the DVR and deleted some shows I had been saving.    These gems  were 20 some odd minutes (sans commercials) of pearls of wisdom that so closely related to events in my life that I didn’t have the heart to delete them.   They’re all gone now though, to make room for more recordings.    But in my typical J-Dub fashion, I had my pen and paper with me and I made notes prior to deleting.

Here are just a few  highlights:

The Middle May 2016 valedictorian episode.

Axel:  what are you thinking about right now?

Brick: How much she loves me.

Axel: What are you not thinking about right now?

Brick: Death, the futility of the universe that’s always simmering at a low boil.

Snort!  That’s so meeeee!!!!

Mike:  dads are not supposed to know what’s going on. We like being in the dark. Let me know when the kids are getting married.

Mike: you didn’t worry about people the whole time they went out at night.  You said a prayer and went to bed and that was it.

Frankie in a voiceover regarding phone apps:  They’re never going to come up with one that makes you stop worrying.  That’s the price you pay for loving people.

Of course Frankie  and the whole bra thing “then at least let’s take my car there’s one in the glove box.” LOL

From Blackish, the Jack and Diane career test episode.   For the record, I am a daughter of a blue-collar mechanic so I always tend to lean towards that bent.    And if you ever saw the 1970 something movie Breaking Away, I’d be a townie or a cutter!   Belated rabbit hole alert. Now back to your regularly scheduled program.

Pops:  it’s not like you two are doing so good.  You’re too busy to pick up your own children from school.   You expect a drunk old man to do it.

Bow: you drove the kids drunk?

Pops:  not that it’s any of your business but I Uber’ed it.

Ruby:  she has a nastiness that smacks of the devil!

Charlie: I killed a burglar when I was nine. I’m going to ball up my fists, may be go time. I’ll un-ball one of my fists, keep one in the chamber.

Pops:  we’re going to have a generation of You-tubing, selfie takers,  living in a house full of shit because nobody can fix the damn toilet!

I think we need more happy people in the world.   We need less people doing things that they think they are supposed to do  rather than doing things for which they have a passion.

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~  Howard Thurman Author, Philosopher, Theologian, Educator, Civil Rights Leader.  

As always, more to come.

You Were A Surprise! Happy Birthday Baby Girl! – Part Two

What’s the Difference between an Accident and a Surprise?

For those who watched the sit-com Roseanne in the 90s, you may remember an episode where Darlene told DJ he was an accident.  Here is the quoted scene:

D.J.: Was I an accident?

Roseanne: No, D.J., you were a surprise.

D.J.: Oh. What’s the difference?

Roseanne: Well, an accident is something that you wouldn’t do over again if you had the chance. A surprise is something you didn’t even know you wanted until you got it.

D.J.: Oh. Was Darlene an accident?

Dan: No, Darlene was a disaster.

Pony and Lulu are 9 and ½ years apart.  Some idiot people out there have told Lulu that she was an accident because of this big age gap.  Or some assume there is another baby daddy.  And that’s ok to have more than one baby daddy; you have no judgment from me on that topic.  But in our case nope, Billy Bob is my only baby daddy.  How many times can one write baby daddy in a paragraph?  Four, the answer is four.  For the record Lulu was not an accident!  She was my life saver.  Born just 5 weeks before my mom died.

Before we got married, Billy Bob and I had the “do you want kids” discussion.  We both wanted kids – me I thought four was a magical number, while he said two.  We decided to split the difference and have three.  Life said – No, you get two but we fooled you life – we have three – Pony, Wise and Lulu.  We have added our daughter in love.  And then one day in the distance future, I will get my four!  Old school math 2+2=4.

Oops, belated rabbit hole alert.  Back to our regularly scheduled program.

Everything was very easy with Pony but when we tried for bambino #2, things did not go as planned.  Sparing the gory details, let’s just say we were devastated.  Idiots again would ask when we were going to have another child and say things like how selfish we’d be to stop at one.  Everyone had an opinion.  We heard them all while keeping our struggles with infertility to ourselves.

But as not to be bitter, moving right along.  Instead, today we celebrate!!!  I say it again: Happy Birthday Baby Girl!  Who won’t see this post because her only social media is Snap Chat … at least I think it’s Snap Chat but who knows?!? I’m not sure.  What I do know is she definitely won’t be perusing FaceBook or WordPress. 🙂

As always, more to come.

You Were A Surprise! Happy Birthday Baby Girl! – Part One

On this day 19 years ago, I went to work like usual after dropping off Pony at school.  I was working Monday through Friday 8:00 to 1:00 and had a 1:30 doctor’s appointment that day.  By this time I was going in weekly.  Since I was considered a high risk pregnancy with gestational diabetes to boot, I was seeing an endocrinologist in addition to my OB.

They always started with a sonogram.  This time though I am told “we’re admitting you” something about cord in each quadrant and low amniotic fluid.  I paged Billy Bob, yes I said paged.  This was a mostly pre-cell phone era or cell phone the size of a brick.  Either way, he did not have one.  The plan was to meet me at the hospital if he got a page.

I went back to work.  Put an out of office message on my Outlook and voice mail.  Re-assigned my diaries to co-workers and told my boss that I was going in.  She hugged me and said “get out of here crazy, you had no business coming back here today” 🙂

At 10:50 pm, Lulu entered the world and our lives were forever changed for the better.  Cue music and tears of joy.



As always, more to come.