S is for Sweatpants ~ April 21, 2018

Am I a rogue dress code rule breaker?  You be the judge.

In a fairly recent former life, I was a manager of people.  I had an employee who would wear sweatpants to work.  Sweatpants are NOT considered business casual.  Therefore, they are not part of the dress code and they are expressly prohibited!!  Shorts are code but sweatpants … nope.  Go figure.

You might have a mental image of workout clothes.  A little worse for the wear maybe.  But these were more track suit pristine.  Nice I tell ya.  My boss used to tell me I needed to have the conversation about dress code with said employee.  I always said I would/I did but in true confessions I never did.  Life’s too short y’all.  And who the hell cared as we were not customer facing AND she was excellent at her job. And my boss was so busy, he’d forget he told me to do something which I blatantly disobeyed.

Fast forward to last week.  I was feeling a little blah as in bloated.  TMI J-Dub.  No one wants to hear this.  Too late now, I am on a roll.  Having eaten one too many rolls of the cinnamon variety.

My clothes are not fitting like they used to.  I know what I need to do but I am not doing it.  I am at a stage of needing to buy the next size up.  Such is life.  This does not upset me.  I simply do not have the time to shop.  Ya know because I have lounging, reading and being a woman of leisure to get on with.  Oh and there is the fact that I HATE to shop.

In a very non J-Dub like move.  I … wore … sweatpants … to … work.  Yes … I … did!  Lol! Sacrebleu!  On a Wednesday too.  I thought I was going to be solo in the office anyways.  I could have worked from home that day y’all but that just makes my mood worse.  I swear I could disappear.  I probably won’t wear my sweatpants to work ever again but if I am honest, I felt fantastic.

In the freedom that comes with loose-fitting clothes, I conquered Mt. Vesuvius.  I used my webcam to call into a meeting that day where the participants could only see me in my company logo polo shirt.  I spoke up as needed; professionally and politely holding my ground.  I surprised myself actually by my firm authoritative stance.  All as my former boss, the one who used to tell me to have the sweatpants dress code talk, sat there grinning like the Cheshire Cat.  I think he thought Jilly did good!  If he only knew what I was wearing.  Ha!

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Número Diecinueve.




R is for Reading ~ April 20, 2018

My mom did at least one thing right.   She read to us.  Bedtime stories were the best.  I remember my little twin bed full of stuffed animals.  I’d line them all up with me to hear her read.  Of course this was the 60s.  I bet most of the stories were not even politically correct.  Crazy to think what passed for children’s literature back in the day.  Sort of like the scary version of nursery rhymes.  Still some of our choices were tame.  My absolute favorite was No Roses for Harry by Gene Zion, illustrated by Margaret Bloy Graham.  That dog. Haha!  His rose doggie sweater from Grandma became a bird’s nest eventually.  Comical how he kept trying to lose the sweater and the events unfolded.  LOVE!

I know from my mom’s journal that she read to us every night even as infants. She was very strict in her routines and that happened to be one of them.  Somehow I myself do not even remember learning to read.  I just always could.  I followed along and parroted/mimicked her at first I am sure.  Saying I always knew how to read is weird and many will call BS but I believe it is true.  My first memories besides the bedtime stories were pulling the funnies from the Sunday paper to practice reading.  This was before I was in kindergarten.

I believe reading is the foundation to everything.  Not the everyone has to be as avid a reader as I am but if you can read, you can figure out almost anything.  As I think about my post-retirement chapter (sadly still 9 to 12 years away thank you poor financial decision to buy a piece of God’s acreage at this late stage in life), I think about doing something regarding literacy.  Boy I have been holding that in for a while!  Lol, just nerves not regret.  Our hill country paradise is just that in 180 easy payments with only 177 left to go 😉

Maybe I do not need to wait for retirement.  There is a very special V word on the horizon.  Reading could be part of that?? And now those with dirty minds are wondering.  V-word?  Hmm.  Well you will just have to wait.  Check back with me on 4/25/18.

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Número Dieciocho.


Q is for Quit ~ April 19, 2018

Quitters never win and winners never quit!

Uh nope.  Wrong J-Dub.  The correct saying is Winners never cheat, cheaters never win.

Oh well, I Ain’t No Quitter and I am not talking about the Shania Twain song either.  I mean she’s ok but this post ain’t about that.  I resolve to quit writing ain’t.  Closer but this post ain’t about that either.

R U sure?  Lawd yes.  I am trying to take things up a notch.  Spruce up the place.  Make my blog a place where folks come and sit a spell.  Take their shoes off.  Ya know.  Feel cozy while we enjoy a cup of tea.  First, I am going to quit writing like someone who is uncouth.

Now, now Jilly didn’t you post something about J is for Judgment?  Shouldn’t you quit judging people based on their poor grammar and word choices?  Must you always throw round your large verbose vocabulary?  And what about P is for Pride?  Go back and re-read your stuff.

Actually, there are a few things I need to quit.

  1. Overthinking
  2. Worrying caused by overthinking
  3. Putting myself down also caused by overthinking

Hmmm.  I should just learn to do #1 and that takes care of almost everything. Yet I have a deep-rooted attraction with overthinking … I can’t quit YOU!

I can’t quit you! That’s a movie line y’all.  Sooner or later everything I do comes back to movie/music/books/TV … must google that line later to see which one. Ah but wait … I remember … Brokeback Mountain.  Such a beautiful movie.  The story moving and the cinematography outstanding. Ang Lee ❤

Pony got free tickets to the premiere at the Quarry Theater. He was still in high school and part of VASE (Visual Arts Scholastic Events).  He was part of the crew … built scenes and competed in sound.   His winning complimentary movie tickets was quite common.  He had competition that night so the tickets were passed on to me.  Just two months before Pony and I had gone to see North Country.  Another set of free tickets.  This was in 2005.  A banner year y’all.  A time before the terrible awful.  Do-over please!

I have no idea why I am telling you folks all this.  Except sometimes I feel like I NEED to go back again. After all N is for Nostalgia.  Or I am going down a rabbit hole.  Hoppity hop up to memory lane.  Another thing I need to quit.  Going off on tangents and/or living in the past.

Yep!  That’ll do it. Quittin time.

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero Diecisiete


P is for Pride ~ April 18, 2018

This post might get me fired.

You can’t get fired from a volunteer position silly.

Okay, then this post might make blog followers leave me in droves.

Well then droves would have to follow you first.

You’re not all that and a bag of chips Jilly.

I know!  That hole in the ozone.  Didn’t you read G is for Guilt? Or C is for Confession?  I am the worst!

Pish Posh.  What do you care if people don’t agree with your position?  You’re entitled to your feelings even if your opinion is not the popular one. O is for Opinion was yesterday.

Popular, Hmmm.  I should have chosen popular as my P word.  I could have quoted Tina Fey Means Girls all over the place.

Or maybe Pish Posh?  Then I could have made this post about sounds. Pfft!  Ya that.

Or even people? Ear worm alert! As I sing at the top of my lungs: People. People who need people are the luckiest people in the world. Sister Teresa would be proud. Doh!

How about: Up, up with people you meet em wherever you go.  Up, Up with people they’re the best kind of folks you know.  If more people were for people all people everywhere. There’d be a lot less  …

Stop singing! you picked pride.

Ugh! Did you know that pride is the deadliest sin?  Tis true. The root of all others.

I have tried hard to be humble and avoid pride.  Now I hear Tim McGraw’s Humble and Kind.  One of the few country songs I can stand.  Followed quickly by the Mission Impossible TV show theme song.  Your mission that you chose to accept ….

For me, that was making my parents proud.  To be the best darn Jilly ever.  They had enough chaos to deal with without me being a pain.  Instead I became the proverbial people pleaser.

Really that shit started way back in my earliest memories.  I was not and am not now perfect yet the bane of perfectionism follows me around wherever I go … to this day!

I’ve been called aloof, conceited, know-it-all, you name it.  I do not protest too much.  My self-esteem is below the lowest low because I am NOT perfect! <gasp> You’re not surprised; you knew that all along.  And here I was thinking I had you fooled.

Don’t cry for me Argentina / bloglandia.  I am in a mood.  I’ll get over it.

As always, more to come.

P.S. The italicized are song lyrics that Sister Teresa had us sing in Glee Club.  Yep betcha didn’t know it but St. Margaret Mary’s Glee Club was the da bomb diggity waaayyyy before the more recent commercialized Glee.  Check out this nostalgic find.  After all N is for Nostalgia.  That is our album cover – 1977 or 1978-ish.  And yes those are negatives and undeveloped film.  No idea what is on them.


This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero  Dieciséis


Early Reflecting on A-Z, Discipline & Haiku

This A-Z is the bomb diggity.  I am meeting new folks.  Melanie Crouse is one such person.  She is fantastic.  You must check out Melanie’s Stories

I did and I listened to the optimal living daily #852 podcast on 7 discipline mastering practices by Leo Babauta.  Say that 3 x’s fast.  🙂

First off Justin “the voice” had me at hello there Jilly.  I could listen to him 4eva.  Now I am gonna stick to what I say I am gonna do.  Like exercise and eating right.  I won’t spoil it for anyone, listen for yourself.

In less than 10 minutes I learned that I am gullible and very easily influenced.  I need to quit it!  lol.  One step was to sit in your hunger for a while (I am paraphrasing) Doing so would teach me that the world will not crumble if I am hungry.  If I sit in my hunger, I realize that I will survive and I can then make better choices like eating an apple instead of gorging on chips.  But they are Lays and no one can eat just one!!!! However bad Jilly tendencies came back.  Causing me to create this Haiku.

my brain is fuzzy

because I’m very hungry

bad habits die hard

I like sitting in it.  Hunger pangs are addictive.  Then when I do eat, bliss.  Like the chips I scarfed down the second I entered the house.  And that is not good folks.

My daily share.  Sorry for the dark turn.  The next one is funny.  I promise.

As always, more to come.


O is for Opinion ~ April 17, 2018

Last year I was asked to respond to a survey of sorts and doing so has got me all outta sorts.  Like riled up a tad bit ya know.  Might be another confusing post but I must speak in innuendo.  Some of you may see through my guise however and that’s mighty fine too.

No secret my undergrad took me 20 plus years to complete.  I came out of that experience none the wiser.  Stinking expensive piece of paper.  Toilet paper.  I had job specific designations out the ying yang but that wasn’t enough.  I needy the bloody uni degree.  Look at me channeling someone from across the pond.  Muah! That is my OPINION of a higher education.  You go get your own.  But I digress.

If I, for a moment, do not think about paying off student loans until I am dead, maybe college was not a complete waste.  I may have actually learned a trick or two.  There was this one class – Research Methodologies that I took my senior year.  We had to write our own objective survey.  That mi amigos/amigas is more difficult than one imagines.

Did you know there are leading questions that skew survey results?  I remember getting drafts back that were completely lined through in bright red!  Try again J-Dub and you’ll eventually get it.  And while you’re getting it, land the plane why don’t you?

Here we go.  The present day survey is garbage.  The statement is:

On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being strongly disagree and 5 being strongly agree answer the following:

At work, my opinions seem to count.

Now shut the front door, what does seem mean?  Give an appearance or impression.  Dare I say illusion.  Cuz guess what folks? That’s a trick question.  At work (or life in general) your opinion does NOT count.  Ever.  Never ever.  Nope! Kinda, sort of, not really. Opinions are like <fill in the blank> Everybody has one.

Ya see, drawing on my vast experience (single course) as a survey writer, the question is worded improperly.  Seem is an odd word choice and for many folks the word count is a verb.  Meaning if my opinion counts, you will act on my counsel or preference.  Very few people get the opportunity to actually influence wide-scale change. Best one can gain is control over his/her reactions.

Let’s try the statement this way:

On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being strongly disagree and 5 being strongly agree answer the following:

At work, I am allowed to express my opinions.

Bingo! J-Dub answers a resounding 5 plus plus.  In fact, I am encouraged to give my opinion. Speak up!

Now put that in your proverbial peace pipe and smoke it with your best friend at work.

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero quince.

N is for Nostaglia ~ April 16, 2018

Aaaah yes.  The good old days. Glorious bastards!

I have to ask myself though, were the good old days really that good?

And as I wait for your gifts of feedback, here are my two cents worth zilch after inflation is applied.  I believe nostalgia puts a twist on everything and my feelings are more revisionist history.  Re-painting the scene as something better than first experienced.  Not that the past is all bad.  Things were at times sweet and sentimental.  It is just that well … it is just that the past is gone.

I re-paint my memories a lot y’all.  It’s called denial.  And De-Nile isn’t a river in Egypt.  Are you using humor to deflect yet again J-Dub?  Your modus-operandi is tired and worn out girl.  Get some new shtick.

They say you can’t go home again.  I think “they” may be onto something.  Instead I am content to be present and fully live in the here and now.

Next is the interactive part.  Let me know your thoughts.  My comments section is lonely and open for business.  Mind outta the gutter people.  Lol.

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero catorce.

Seven More To Go

… then Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge Survivor will be mine bitches!

Now Now Jilly no need for that language.

Sorry folks, I got a little excited there.

I have written and scheduled this week’s N to S rambles. I did that preemptively so that I can read more and worry less about my own stuff.  I have the last seven letters to finish – T and Y are done though I still need to give the once over before scheduling and W, well W is writing itself :).

So close I can taste it!  Yes taste! I do plan to reward myself with something sweet.   A survivor sundae maybe? Eaten on a Tuesday.  Yummy.  I wish Baskin Robbins still had the Matterhorn.

As always, more to come.

M is for … ~ April 14, 2018

This is what happens folks when your theme is writing in A to Z order.  And you get stuck on 12 because you’re superstitious and do not want to jinx yourself by stopping at 13.  Means I have to write M and N on the same day. Or get a grip and become sensical … my made up word for the opposite of nonsensical.

M is for lots of things

Movies, Music, Mayhem

Why mayhem? That’d be dark themed again.  Maybe you need to repeat H and be happy?

Okay.  Then what’s another M word?

Think, think, and think

I am thinking with my MIND

All powerful, all knowing


I am not omnipotent and omniscient (save those words for O)

I am not a Megamind.

And just like that WE (the pieces of J-Dub’s mind) have circled back to movies.  Check this out:

Credit for above clip: DreamWorks

I mean the mind is our biggest gift and greatest tool.  And what is my true destiny?  Maybe it is to become a poetess.

M echanics enabling consciousness and thought

I nside the skulls of humans

N eurons as wiring, synapses firing

D elivering us to unlimited heights of pure imagination

Or not.  lol.

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero trece.


L is for Laughter ~ April 13, 2018

I love to laugh.  I mean who doesn’t?  For as long as I can remember, I’ve used laughter as a coping mechanism.  To hide pain, to relieve stress, to calm a heated situation.  The best of all, I laugh daily just because.  I am an observer of life who is easily amused but as you can tell from some of my posts I am also an emotional basket case who was once a very depressed person.

When I first planned this post, I was going to write about Robin Williams and some other comedians who were hilarious on the outside but hiding a deep pain.  Laughter can be two sides of the same coin, like happy/sad or love/hate.  But as I researched, the stories felt way too personal for me to opine about them.  I mean who am I and what do I know?  Answer I am J-Dub and I know some stuff.  Funny? Nope? Oh well.  And don’t worry, I won’t quit the day job.

Here is an acrostic poem to close us out.

oving life to the fullest through

mazing feelings of euphoria

niting human beings with

enuine authenticity and

appiness in abundance hearing

winkling wordless sounds of

ffervescent lightness which

eplenishes our minds, hearts, and souls

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part of Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero Doce.