Category: A Week in Review

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 5/28/23

Published on by J-Dub7 Comments

What a whirlwind. I’m trying not to dwell or Make Stuff Up aka MSU. So far, I’m doing a pretty good job of letting go of the work stuff. It’s nothing until it’s something. I distracted myself with mindless TV & baking. I also put the finishing touches on my itinerary for my pilgrimage that kicks off Thursday! I am alternatingly sick & excited. Not truly sick, but the butterflies are flying. I’m just nervous I guess.

My sweet Lulu Belle is funny. She said if they hurt me, she will rain fire down on them like they’ve never seen before. She kind of sounded like Samuel L Jackson’s character, Jules in Pulp Fiction. But she’s a tiny little sprite of a girl. Nothing she could do all the way from Texas but I appreciate her concern & worry over me. The only thing that will hurt me is a no-show but anything else will provide the healing I need. And even a no-show, I would excuse away eventually after bein crushed in the moment. I feel that I’m not worthy. But Charles has convinced me I belong & I matter. I will carry his words with me.

Now here’s the reverse roll call:

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 5/14/23

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Reverse roll call. I’m making it quick because I’ve got places to go and people to see. Not really, that’s just an expression & I’m full of ’em or full of it! No time for lollygagging around though because I definitely have things to do & that feels awesome. And away we go …

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 5/7/23

Published on by J-Dub13 Comments

Boy howdy folks, this week was rough but manageable in that I’m using the tools from therapy to get by, one day at a time. Sometimes minute by minute, holding on for dear life but I still feel I’ve come out the other side. Hope not to slip back to my sad/bad ways. I’m going to make a worry list & write more often. Getting the intrusive thoughts out is imperative. This making stuff up = MSU is for the birds. Yes, humans have an innate need to know why but ultimately why changes nothing. I’m now firmly planted in the “it is what it is” camp. Even if that means I’m being humored or pitied. Both suck.

My trip is planned & of course the worry the comes with travel is raising its ugly head. I have yet to get Covid. I know several who have flown & managed to stay safe. I hope I’m as fortunate. Still, on my worry list is getting sick. Probably #1 or #2 as getting someone else sick is the top. It’s why I will mask even if I’m the only one. It’s why I picked non-stop flights, then renting a car. I will social distance too as I believe that’s possible. Much of my time will be outdoors. And I’ve been back in the office for over a year now. Somehow it feels like my time is near. While I quit writing about my pain, I’m not pain free, only choosing to deal with the hurt in a new way. Control my reaction or some such nonsense.

I have it in my head that after the peace which hopefully comes from my pilgrimage, I will finally succumb to what has ailed me for all these years. I also have a reoccuring dream where a dog growls at me unmasking my badness since we all known pups can tell. Instinct. Am I evil? I feel guilty for no reason whatsoever, not this time anyway. Ugh, I’m really releasing the hounds. Might as well throw in potential job loss though for that, I am putting aside my fears to deal with what happens if/when it actually happens. My planner told me last year I was ready but I’m not ready until the land is paid off which the severance just might cover.

Calgon take me away. Now for the roll call. Reverse this time …

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 4/30/23

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Shout out HBD to my nephew John! Cheers to another trip around the sun. He’s 47 years old now & I still think of him as maybe three.

This week was a blur as they have all become. Big announcements at work have people extremely upset. I’m not directly impacted as I have only myself to worry about but I’m still in solidarity with those who are directly impacted. Hope the voice of reason comes in soon to fix things. “Hey you in the back, I can hear you laughing”. I agree, I’m silly to think the behemoth that is corporate America gives a flying you know what.

Lulu is doing so much better, crisis averted for the meantime. I don’t want to jinx her by writing this but I just know some good things happened rather quickly to restore my faith. Finding help for mental health issues can often be a fool’s errand. I’m still so full of idioms. What a great AtoZ challenge! I’m a winner!!

Okay, time for a quick roll call, then I will get out of your hair.

Blogging A to Z April Challenge

The Usual Fodder

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 4/16/23

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No preamble today, just roll calls …

Blogging A to Z April Challenge

The Usual Fodder

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 4/9/23

Published on by J-Dub3 Comments

The butterflies are flying. I’m nervous because my hearing is this Friday! I think I did all the paperwork correctly to get on the docket. If I drive all that way for nothing, I will lose it. Actually, I told myself, if things go south, I will consider the trip a nice little adventure with time by myself in a hotel room which is priceless. I miss business travel, truly I do. Anyway, I’m prepared to be told ‘no’ but if I don’t at least try, I would always wonder. But this is a week in review not a look forward to Friday so let’s roll call.

Blogging A to Z April Challenge

The Usual Fodder

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 3/26/23

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Quick roll call then we’re out the door to a drag brunch. On Saturdays when we walk, we go right past the venue – Paramour at the Phipps. The place s always jumping & the music, well enough said! We’ve always said we should plan to go one of these days. With Lulu’s imminent move, today is the first time for everything.

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 3/19/23

Published on by J-Dub4 Comments

Hello my friends. I have so much to reflect upon. My thoughts are too jumbled up to be coherent though. If I was talking to you my speech would be rapid fire, staccata. Kind of how I was with Charles, my new therapist.

I still marvel how a dude can help me but speaking with someone that I have no connection with provides that much needed objectivity. Because I feel no affinity to Charles … yet … I can tell him everything without fear. Wish me luck.

Now time for the roll call …

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.

Sunday Reflections: A Week in Review ~ 3/12/23

Published on by J-Dub7 Comments

I know this is repetitive to say but time is flying by faster than usual. BIG things are happening in the space of a week which really is not that long. Sort of feels like forever in a day though too. If this pace keeps up I will miss something. Which means I need to get rid of the sH!t that makes me crazy. Fuck ’em. This weekend was full of self care. The SA Botanical Gardens were beautiful & a much needed distraction as was lunch at WD Deli afterwards. My Lulu Belle is closing on her first house with the fiancé in April. Means she’s leaving me again like her 4 years away at college. This is the natural order of things & I am over the moon happy. We have a relationship that won’t change with distance. If anything, we’ll be stronger ❤

Now for the roll call … reverse this time …

Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.

As always, more to come.