Last week I reflected without a roll call. After 2 hours, I made the post private. Here in a bit I will change it back to public. Life shared becomes poetry or something deep like that. We are less alone in our struggles & our happiness too for that matter.
I’m waxing philosophical as my mother in law appears to be declining more rapidly than times before this. Her life has become a series of falls, hospitals stays, nursing home stint, now back home. Where she claims she has gone to die. But that Polish stubborn streak keeps her here. Plus my father in law, her true life time love telling her he is not ready for here to go, causes her to hang on. Sad & beautiful all at once. Morbid maybe but I wish they could “The Notebook” out of here.
Yesterday B got a call to come here quick for a “talk”. He went solo but then called me & said come over, it was not what he first thought. So LuLu and I joined him. MoMo was unresponsive … or so they thought. Still breathing but she could be roused. PoPo with B’s help had called hospice but hospice was backlogged so they sent some version of EMS light. The whole scenario was something like this …
LuLu & I enter through the french doors. PoPo is in his chair right next to a sleeping MoMo, B on the couch. PoPo repeats for us how she took a pain pill at 7 AM & has been like “this’ since. He was worried because she couldn’t stay awake like yesterday & the day before that. Neither he or B could wake her up. Seeing her was pretty jarring … the first time for LuLu to see her in neck brace, with gash across forehead, deep bruises covering her face & arms. We’re told hospice is sending someone.
As we wait we try to reassure PoPo that she needs to sleep in order to heal & that a pain pill at 7 AM isn’t overmedicated like the last time. He doesn’t really understand that her pain pill is Tylenol & not even Tylenol 3. Only RX due to the dosage but otherwise can be purchased over the counter. It really isn’t that kind of OXY type pain pill & definitely not causing her lethargy.
EMS comes in all brusque. Why are some of these people helpers ass holes? Not truly, I think you have to be this way or you’d absorb all the pain & not be able to function. He asks if she is full code or DNR? She just signed DNR day before yesterday so she is full code until the papers come back from hospice on Monday.
EMS gets her to wake up, being more forceful than either PoPo or B. He does his assessment & everything is good, All vitals, sugar level, everything. He tells us this could be anything & for peace of mind, he can take her to a hospital (and should since technically full code). Says he gives everyone a freebie though & asks her a series of questions to see if he can circumvent the hospital.
EMS: Ma’am what’s your name?
MoMo in a growl: Hildegard!!!!!!
MoMo smiling: I’m really Mary Alice
EMS: Do you know where you are?
MoMo: My home
EMS: When is your birthday?
MoMo: July 7th
EMS: Are you in pain?
MoMo: Me & pain are best friends. Did they tell you I broke my neck? I never did that before.
EMS: Do you want to go to the hospital?
MoMo: NO! I came home to die!
EMS: Well you aren’t dying today. So you can stay here.
To us he says, she is of sound mind & he must respect her wishes. To call him back if anything changes. He goes on to explain that her sleeping so much is her body healing. This helped since PoPo didn’t really believe us when we said the same. PoPo should watch for labored breathing, fidgeting & other signs of distress but generally sleeping by itself even for long stretches is good considering the trauma she’s been through. He leaves & PoPo tries to kick us out but we stay. He does this because he says he feels guilty that we do too much. We don’t not really & we knew he wanted us to stay.
MoMo: I had a nice life, I want you to know that. You are ALL blessings to me even you Jill. Someone tell me a favorite memory. And Lulu does just that. Then after a while, we leave. Walking back home from their house is always therapeutic. We get to debrief what we went through. Unveil our deepest fears. Me & my wolfpack, only missing Pony.
Then last night went off without a hitch & now we’re back to day by day.
Another Sunday with reflections only but no roll call.
Peace y’all. Until next time. Stay safe.
As always, more to come.