08/20/2022 – J-Dub's Grin and Bear It

Hmmm, August 20th. There is something significant about this date that I am forgetting about. I feel it back there somewhere in the recesses of my brain. I wonder if what happened on this day is too traumatic to remember. Maybe? Hmmm again. Oh well. Time to get along with the task at hand. #SoCS in the house where the lovely Linda G Hill writes & I copy paste. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “key.” Use it as a noun, a verb, or use it metaphorically. Have fun! To join in, HERE are the rules & pingback.

I love the word key and immediately think what about skeleton key. I can surely do something with that right? Followed by what about a tiny metal key used to lock my childhood diary? That might be good too. Or what about the key to enlightenment? Naw, that sounds too much like homework.

On Monday, I’m getting my first ever tattoo. I delayed this experience because mom wouldn’t stand for it, but she has been gone over 24 years & I’m a grown ass woman.

Yep you heard me. Haha! I am!! A grown ass woman!!! Even if I do not always behave that way. For my tattoo, I considered a key. A metaphorical key & went to town looking at ideas on the web. Lots of talented people out there folks. But then I remembered Lulu drew us hearts.

She drew two but only showing the one in color

Then my new friend posted her brave artwork on Twitter which follows:

It’s a half baby heart with a momma heart that displays so much emotion I almost need to look away but I can’t look away at the same time.

However, decisions were already made to get a heart on my sleeve, the one Lulu made for us. That is the key to enlightenment. Or my awakening if you will. Instead, with her assistance, some modifications have been made because sweet Lulu knows the significance of the half baby by momma heart. My sweetest sensitive soul of a daughter just gets what I’m going through even though she has not been down my road.

To help her momma cope, Lulu drew an anatomically correct heart without any of the internal lines. Then she added purple, dark pink, & royal blue watercolor. A combo of the two hearts without copyright infringement.

I’m moving the placement of the heart to my wrist which if you think about it, that is where a long sleeve would end. I can still get the heart on my sleeve metaphor. I made the adjustment in placement because I want to see the handiwork all the time once the tattoo is done. No cover up for me.

January 1998, mom in hospice, her best friend came to visit. I stepped out of the room to allow some privacy. But I stayed close by & I overheard mom say “Look after Jill for me. She will struggle with my death & she will need help with the new baby. She has always worn her heart on her sleeve”.

Alrighty, that is all, go talk amongst yourselves. I’m not crying, you’re crying.

As always, more to come.