Ramblings Part Two ~ 2/7/22

Now that I am at my desktop, I no longer have the cute little ram emoticon. Look HERE for the precursor. Been a Hee-haw kind of a morning. Gloom Despair and Agony on Me … lol. Woe is me though fer sure.

I have never in my life had high blood pressure. Other issues to include emotional ones that sometimes manifest into physical (or so they think the cause is mental). That’s the vibe I get when discussing my symptoms. How’d you like to be searching since 2010 for answers? Sucks a$$, I tell ya what.

And I did like my PCP, the one before this one. She always listened and made me feel like I was her only concern in the moment. Her words however didn’t match her writing in my file. Ya see, when she went the concierge route, I didn’t follow, and I got MY file. Whoa nelly, I was gobsmacked.

My current PCP is okay, I’ve seen her twice (maybe three times). She can read what the other doctor wrote and I’m positive that has influenced her decisions in regard to my care. The former told me at my last visit that I didn’t need to suffer and that the antidepressants are different/better now. No need to power through Jilly she said. I replied, I’m happy but I hurt physically, my bones ache. Not ready to get back on those meds just yet.

Now I have zero judgment against anyone taking antidepressants. In fact, some in my closest family do and they are doing well because of it. And had I kept on with the former, I may have done the same but I really want to know what is wrong physically first. I’ve had almost every test known to man and they all come back with something. These accumulated somethings read horrifically but I’m reassured, nothing is too abnormal. In other words, I’m FINE.

Sure if FINE is effed up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional. Jilly is FINE. Ugh!

Now where the heck was I going with all this? Oh yeah. High blood pressure. Today was my annual well-woman checkup. Avert your eyes, or read on. Your choice.

I don’t need OB (uh duh!) but I like the idea of a GYN specialist. I could’ve had my PCP take over this part too but a habit of 24 years with the same GYN is hard to break. At this mornings appointment, I learned I gained 11 lbs in 2021. Ugh! I knew I was up but was thinking more like 7 lbs. That 4 pound difference matters y’all, it just does. Anyway, the worse problem was that my blood pressure was 149/92.

Shut the front door!!! What the what?!!??? I’m a 120/70 gal … my whole life.

We had the pre-exam chat. I filled her in about my life in year since last visit. She asked casually in the right manner about my weight gain. Did I know why? Never said I need to lose it. And I did know. All those damn pies, perfecting my baking skillz among other things. I stress ate while in pain. And for some inexplicable reason, I quit my daily walk in June. I have since started on a new wellness journey of oatmeal with blueberries most days for breakfast AND my 30 minute walk each day. But with just a month+ of oatmeal and only two weeks walking, I’ve notice no difference … YET.

My fear is that my weight gain with lack of exercise caused the high blood pressure. Or worse, my undiagnosed pain really is SOMETHING and that caused the spike. B has been on blood pressure medicine for years. His is always high at the doctor’s office but he checks at home right after and it ALWAYS goes back down. The doctor uses B’s regular at home tracking to say B’s blood pressure med is working. B shared with me that his doctor says pain can elevate blood pressure fer sure.

Now I’m not a doctor but I play one on TV. My pain, is SOMETHING and it IS causing me to be 149/92. My GYN said I should do what I’m doing, add tracking blood pressure since I can use B’s at home set up. Then at my 3/8/22 PCP 6-month follow-up, I can present the evidence to HIM. Ugh! I didn’t have the heart to correct to a HER. I only go to female doctors these days. Then I thought. You have my damn file right? Did you even read it? Or are YOU as scattered as we all are some days?

I did recheck today’s BP after my long drive back home and some heavy duty deep breathing. The reading was still 149 but over 85. GYN said usually 135/85 is as high as they want to see it before intervention. I got the bottom part right. Ha!

There isn’t right or wrong … well a wrong sure but this gives me a new carrot. Dr. Google calling me to search for ways to lower blood pressure naturally. I’ve already created an Excel tracker/log starting weight, weekly weigh in, daily am and pm BP readings. All to share with my PCP in March. God willing AND the creek don’t rise.

I had already taken the day off because there is a part 2 of my lovely women’s wellness day. With all this time on my hands, I’m certifiable. Oh who am I kidding? That’s all day every day.

Off to Wordle.

As always, more to come.


๐Ÿ blings ~ 2/7/22

Yes the she that is me is a whirling dervish. Waiting for an appointment and of course Iโ€™m nervous ๐Ÿ˜ฌ. Bet my blood pressure will be through the roof.

Iโ€™ve forgotten this feeling of anticipation. It kinda sucks not gonna lie. I actually enjoyed the commute here. And the tunes are helping. So there is that.

Deep breath ๐Ÿ˜ฎโ€๐Ÿ’จ slowly exhale ๐Ÿ˜ฎโ€๐Ÿ’จ. Ohm ohm ohm. Aaaaahh letโ€™s get this show on the road.