MidWeek Update ~ 1/19/22

Having off Monday was in hindsight a godsend. We started the ball rolling on assisted living care (ALC) for MoMo. Not cheap by any means but surprisingly less expensive that a nursing home. I’m learning quite a bit trial by fire and there is a difference. People would be surprised to know (at least I was) that ALC is a precursor to a nursing home. I always thought they were all one in the same.

And things have been a bit sales pitchy with call after call coming in after I placed my inquiry in “A Place for Mom” search tool. A free service that gets paid by the facility who wins your business. Yep, seems a bit like a racket but people have to make their money some way.

I told my FB friends I was going to write a book of ‘how to‘ so no one else has to go through this but then A Place for Mom came through. They already have the ‘how to‘ manual. Connie is the best even checking in yesterday evening to see how we were doing. No sales convo, just an Are you doing ok? and remember to breathe. Nice touch. Turns out she is a former social worker and while precluded by law to recommend, etc, she did send me all the details we could consume for how to maneuver this otherwise shitshow. Yep I said it. We are in a cluster right now. Aaaaahhhhhh. Stress kills I tell ya what. Life is not for the faint of heart.

As always, more to come.

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7 thoughts on “MidWeek Update ~ 1/19/22

  1. It is a stunning level of stress to care for an elderly person with dementia and my mother-in-law was in gradual decline for a couple of decades as she got older. At first she lived entirely on her own but then she needed some help and we rented out a room in her house to folks who agreed to help her out in exchange for low rent. That didn’t last to long. She became too disagreeable for them to put up with.

    Then our daughter moved in with her for a while. As things progressed, she became very hurtful and cruel, often leaving my daughter in tears, so we had her move in with us. That lasted about a year as she continued to decline.

    When we had to put my wife’s mother in a home we had a much easier time of it than many others in the same situation. It seems that real estate was much cheaper out here doctors liked to buy single story private homes with lots of bedrooms and yard space and convert them into ALS units and nursing homes. it was a clever move on their part as one could see a tidal wave of elderly approaching and they would need care. There were a couple within walking distance in my residential neighborhood.

    We picked one that was a half mile away that we drove or rode our bikes past almost every day. It was more expensive than the larger apartment building style units but it was also much more personal. The staff were very friendly and kind towards the residents and my wife the nurse judged them to be very competent. She passed away there soon after her100th birthday and we were all there when it happened. There wasn’t much turnover and we still kept in touch with the staff for quite a while after.

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    1. Thanks so much for sharing this Fred. Makes us feel less alone. We are taking a leap of faith by going with the 1st place that could do her assessment but they did come highly recommended. Worse comes to worse, this is a month to month agreement and we can always groundhog day look for another place. I already feel a kinship with the admissions coordinator and the nursing director. They are angels. I think you have to be almost to get into this profession. Everyone in this process has been very kind. Some helping to an extent over and above.

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    1. That is true and today we learned PoPo needs some assistance too. In the two visits so far the nurses picked up on things we didn’t notice. Add to the pile. But I guess first things first.

      Liked by 1 person

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