A dear friend passed away unexpectedly last night. I am stunned and in disbelief.  I go to the keyboard to process my feelings.  She would understand.  That was her gift.

We grew up together in a small close knit community.  My dad and her mom were co-workers for a time.  We parted ways as life would have it.  The last time I saw her was at a funeral where we stayed behind after the Rosary to catch up.  Just like time had stopped and never separated us.  Our connections remained despite changes in geography.  We planned many a time to get together but something usually intervened. I always knew that through the miracle of technology, she was never more than a click away.

I have extracted two years worth of texts and FB messages onto a 50 page Word document.  I wanted to keep something tangible.  I may even turn our conversations into a new category – Quotes from Cat. My wise sweet friend.  Gone too soon.

What’d we ever do before Internet?  Get in the horse and buggy and go to the annual barn dance?  I only partially joke.  Say what you will about privacy but I for one am forever grateful social media exists even though it does not replace a phone call or face to face.

She was one of my first followers on the blog.  Directly via Word Press too, not just through FB sharing.  She encouraged me to keep on writing and keep on smiling.  She had this innate ability to know when I most needed a friend and she’d pop up on messenger with impeccable timing.  “You’re on my mind” she’d write.  And I’d feel her warmth and caring.  This is her last note to me:

Thank you so much for sharing the stories. Beautiful. Isn’t it amazing how things work out for the best? Love you. Even if life keeps us from seeing each other for years our common beginnings keep us “family”

Not going with my usual sign off.  I need a break from the MORE that is inevitably to come.  Not to be too preachy but oh what the hell.  I am going to testify.  Stop whatever  fool thing is preventing you from having a life worth living.  Pay it forward! Hug your loved ones and never be the first to let go.  Tell the people in your life what they mean to you while they are still around to hear it.

31 thoughts on “Heartbroken

  1. Sending you so much love. It’s hard to love and lose someone close to you. I had my mom murdered when I was 35, it was a big part of my path of self-forgiveness. I empathize and ask for a blessing for you of understanding. Love, Debbie

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hugs. I so understand. I lost a dear friend whom I met online and we were close for a decade. We even met up in person and it was one of the most precious relationships I have ever had. She was gone in a few months and I never saw her again before then. I have a file with allof our emails. Aren’t we blessed to have such beautiful moments?

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    1. Thanks Michael. This loss reminded me. Hoping others see this before they experience a loss of their own. Right now I’m wracked with would’ve should’ve could’ve.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Its like when a loved one is leaving to go somewhere you tell them you love them as you never know if they’ll come back. But you have so many memories to hold close to you.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. What a blessing to have such a love with someone, a connection. Some people go their whole lives and never even get a glimpse of what you and Cat shared. I always pray for you my friend but extra now and in the days to come for you and her family as well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you 🙏 Margaret. I’m very blessed and forever grateful. She was my hero. For the last almost 30 years she battled illness. She lost 7 family members in 7 months. Not a typo either. Through each sadness, she persevered. Always faithful. Always bringing laughter. I still can’t come to grips that this happened. I put it all in His hands. Something good will come from this.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. You have my condolences for your loss. You also have my congratulations on having had such an outstanding person in your life. The pain fades but the good things will remain.

    Liked by 1 person

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