H is for Happy ~ April 9, 2018


I can hear you folks … your collective gasp.

Happy!  Really?  Naw she’s such a moody soul.  Always wearing her heart out there on her sleeve. Airing all that dirty smelly laundry.

No worries mi amigos.  I can be happy.  Really, I can. And shockingly I am happy more often than not.  I just fall back into comfortable patterns.  Eeyore and me, we’re best buds. Ziggy from the other day.  Him too.

The crux of the matter is I am an emotional person and happy is an emotion.

Duh Jill we know that.

One with which I am intimately familiar.

We know that too.

One day I was in the break room at work filling up my water.  I ran into two co-workers and smiled saying hello.  Actually I waved frantically and my hello was more of an over the top HELLO.  <Air kiss, air kiss.> Hi’s, good to see you, and just how have you been all around.

I left with my water and as I got a few feet away, I realized I had left the lid to my cup.  As I turned and walked back around, I heard one say “She’s a weirdo.  No one is always that happy” and the other one simply said “I know, right”.

They saw me, mouths gaping, eyes wide.  I wanted to say bite me bitches.  I am sure I was my usual grin and bear it that day.  Part of me wanted to agree too.  Yes! I am really not THAT happy and scream you have no idea!  Instead I got my lid, looked them directly in the eyes and said have a fantastic rest of your day.

The way I was in the break room was genuine.  My exuberance just pops out.  Most of the time my happiness is always outta control happy.  Why?  Well because I have experienced such sadness in my 53 years on this planet.  Happy and sad, two sides of the same coin … a topic that I might explore in future letter posts.

Now I am reminded of the Pixar Movie Inside/Out.   Joy just wanted Riley to be happy.  This scene gets me every time.

As always, more to come.

This post was written as part Blogging From A to Z April (2018) Challenge.

Numero Ocho.