I am airing out my wound having just snapped the day 4 record of what will be now be known as my Thursday burn. Things look worse y’all. I know I am not a doctor, I just play one by Googling WebMD but I think I may just have to make a workman’s comp claim.
All but one blister popped and that one got bigger. I fear infection could set in. Such a deep red color, purplish red. Hard to tell what is really happening. I guess I should have gone to someone other than the nurse. She was good … excellent really … in my time of need. However even she said flat out that she could not diagnose me.
The worst fight ever came with Robyn screaming of “I hate you!” “I will never forgive you!” “How could you say that?” “Never speak to me again”
Knowing enough not to fight back Peter said nothing. He vowed to never speak of this matter to Robyn again. He regretted the words the minute they passed his lips. He had cut through her heart. She was deeply wounded and it was his fault.
He drove them home, with her in the back seat sobbing. Thinking about what the doctor said “not saying it does not make it NOT so Robyn” “Peter loves you deeply and only wants the best” “Now we can tackle this head on”
He had betrayed her or at least that is how she saw it. Only then did he realize how deep denial can go. To a dark and empty place, a fertile ground for rage.
The next day was one neither would forget. Robyn acted in retaliation with motives no one could understand. Least of all her. The human mind is quite complex. Proving yet once again society can never really know anyone and that of which they are capable.
Fast forward to the 2nd anniversary of the doctor’s appointment which would always mark before and after. Has it really been only two years? Forever ago and yesterday in a blink of the eye. Hard to believe last year they still lived it. In the middle of making amends. The aftermath. How quickly one forgets. How quickly people go back to the discomfort they know.
The problem that was the root cause of Robyn’s misdeed remains buried. Never addressed. At least not properly. Peter has kept his vow of silence to never speak of it again. Yet Robyn can read his mind. A telepathy. The only thing she wants is his forgiveness. The only thing he cannot give her is forgetting. And so they dance.
I am glad you are on the mend Helen. It’s true being sick is the worst. I’ve missed the worst of what’s going around this season. Knock on wood.
I picked Blues Travelers Letter from a Friend. Writer(s): John C. Popper, Robert Vaughan Sheehan.
The only thing letter related is the title. But the words are poignant and speak to me. I hope you take comfort in the words as I do.
“Letter From A Friend”
Never a day goes by when I can’t see his face
And I can hear a thundering voice that no one will replace
But since he left you’ve been hiding out and I can understand
It seems to me about that time you should be coming back again
I can feel the pain
That won’t go away
We can’t change that he left us
But it’s up to you to stay
And I will make sense of it all
Gonna try to make sense of it all
You ask me why
‘Cause it’s all I can do
I miss him every day
But now I miss you
I know it hurts right now but you’ve got to keep moving on
And I know how good it can feel when you’re safe and withdrawn
But he can live in our memory and you don’t yet have that choice
‘Cause you’re still here and to speak to me you’re gonna have to use your voice
I ain’t telling you what’s right
And I ain’t telling you what’s wrong
But it’s he who has died
And it’s you who has gone
And I will make sense of it all
Gonna try to make sense of it all
You ask me why
‘Cause it’s all I can do
I miss him every day
But now I miss you
I know you’re thinking now you must go through this alone
But it’s time to come home
I can feel the pain
That won’t go away
We can’t change that he left us
But it’s up to you to stay
And I will make sense of it all
Gonna try to make sense of it all
You ask me why
‘Cause it’s all I can do
I miss him every day
But now I miss you
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J-Dub's Grin and Bear It 