Could It Get Any Worse?

Dr. AB Cee: Are you his guardian?

Jenny: NO! Absolutely not! And I will not be.  I cannot be responsible for him.  I am his representative payee but even that needs to change. What if I die first?  There’s a service –  Family Elder Care.  I need to get on that waiting list.  I’ve been saying that for years though.

Dr. AB Cee: I understand, I am only asking to assess his situation.  I do not want him signing anything unless he has the authority to do so and sounds like he does.

Jenny: I don’t know about that.  His comprehension level might be that of a six year old.  He won’t understand. Even if he signs.

Dr. AB Cee:  Call Mr. Free at 555-614-4157 for more details. On my end, I will recommend release to the group home.  Do you have the name and number for them?

Jenny (from rote memory & feeling numb):  The group home coordinator is Andy.  His number is 555-444-2323. When did this happen?  Last night?

Dr. AB Cee: No, he was arrested 9/25.

Jenny (shocked): What?!?  But that’s three weeks ago.  Why didn’t anybody call me!!

Noise Playing In The Background

We have a Showtime free preview weekend.   I have scheduled the DVR to record some movies that I will get to later.  Right now Steve McQueen: The Man & Le Mans is noise playing in the background.  So much to do, so little time.  Not cliche’  My list of things I want to see grows exponentially.  I need to make a better matrix for discerning where I spend my precious time so as not to waste it.

I’d love to get your feedback.  Simple answers – Yes = time well spent or No = time wasted:

  1. The Disaster Artist – James Franco
  2. Lucky – Harry Dean Stanton
  3. Ladybird
  4. Battlecreek
  5. Wind River
  6. Florida Project

Ultimately any of the above is a time suck.  When I eventually get around to actually sitting down and watching that is.  And since I am stuck in analysis paralysis, I am going to do laundry.  Gotta keep moving.


#SoCS November 4, 2017 ~ Shortcut/Cut Short

Top ‘O the morning to ya!  What a fine November day! We’re playing it loosely goosey in this session as there are no additional instructions besides what is shown here: Rules and Ping Back  Thank you Linda for hosting!  You are simply the BEST!

Today’s prompts are shortcut and/or cut short. No need to think, think, think.  The thought bubble is front and center of my brain.  Life cut short!  We’ve most certainly had terrible examples of that recently.

Las Vegas, Manhattan

I have no words.

Wynona recently told me that she believes that way back in the day, the same number of atrocities occurred as they do now.  Factoring in population increases of course.  To her, the difference is social media.  We are now simply more aware of what’s going on.


In your face. 

She holds that things are not getting worse.  She even cited some really disturbing news from the 1920s.  I say gurl you’ve got a fantastic coping mechanism.  Me? I am Eeyore and life cut short  happens way too often for my tastes.  And I believe things are getting worse.  At every turn there is another example.

And not just in media grabbing huge ways either.  On a personal individual scale too.  Yesterday would have been B’s brother’s 52nd birthday but he died 11 years ago.  Life cut short.  RIP Broham.  You are missed.  And we know a litany of others who have gone too soon. May the souls of the faithful departed rest in peace.

My CBT is going famously.  On 11/1, I caught up after missing my much-needed appointment on 10/26.  Our conversation went something like this:

Me:  My anxiety is through the roof these days.  Not worrying about Lulu, she’s fine.  But life.  Those poor people on the bike lane in Manhattan could not have seen it coming.  Scary how random things are.

Therapist: What’s making you anxious is the lack of control.

Me: Exactly.  I can curl up and never leave my house or go out and die. I pick curl up.

Therapist: You can’t hide from living but you can reduce what causes your anxiety.

Me: How?

Therapist: Do you watch the news and do you have news alerts on your phone?

Me: Of course, doesn’t everybody?

Therapist: No, not everyone and if you know watching the news upsets you, the simple fix is don’t watch the news. Turn off the alerts.

Me: But I want to be informed.

Therapist: Or do you want to be in control?

Things that make you go hmmmmm.

And with that, I remember all my insurance training.  Avoidance truly is the BEST risk mitigation strategy.

And with that, my stream is no longer flowing.  I am going to further release my anxiety by going on that walk with B.  I am trying to keep pace with my teammates AND create life long habits.  No shortcuts to better health!  Today we take the scenic route :).