Carnival

Originally written 10 months ago in October of 2016.  Seems fitting I post this now as I recently found out that my grade school is closing this year forever ending the fall carnival.

A slight little change in the weather with another cool front for the weekend sounds fabulous.   Makes me nostalgic.   Fall is my absolute favorite time of the year.

I have fond memories of my school carnival always the last Saturday of October rain or shine. ¬†Fish pond, cake walk, haunted house. ¬†We donated cupcakes – Always Duncan Hines – devils food, chocolate icing and candy pumpkin on top. ¬†I think I’ll bake a batch this weekend to give away. ¬†I am on the wagon but all in moderation if I donate multiple people can have a taste.

As always, more to come.

Miracles

In my heart of hearts, the opposite of anything I ever said is what I believe to be true. Miracles do happen, lightning can strike twice, why not?!?!?! ¬†But what are the odds? ¬†I only ever said anything to protect anyway … to not fall too hard and get in so deep that the inevitable ending hurts or wounds beyond repair. ¬†In this short-sightedness, some things in the now that could have been sweet were tarnished. ¬†And¬†recently I realize that acceptance of potential hurt is how one can experience true bliss.

In the bigger scheme of things, I am trying to make things right. ¬†I know that I cannot control/prevent/protect myself anyway. ¬†But oh how I want to … to control and it is in this dysfunctional need that I will seek to find assistance. ¬†Confession is good for the soul. ¬†And I have done that. ¬†But¬†I still need help to gain acceptance of all that I cannot control. ¬†I need to accept so that I can truly forgive … forgive myself for the things I have said and done. ¬†If only I could have¬†a do over. ¬†In absence of that, I will take the next best thing … to¬†more forward.

As Always, More to Come.

 

Cleaning My Virtual Closet

Cleaning my virtual closet …

the place where I keep my drafts.  I have 27 of them.  And I keep adding on.  Then I decided what better to do on this rainy day than to clean up.  And since I am in no mood to physically clean anything; I will waste away hours online and either delete or post what I have saved.  Some of these drafts are over a year old.  Wonder if they will stand the test of time.  I bet most go into the virtual trash can.

Anyway, I am starting now.  This will be my last new post until my closets are clean.

Sing Along Song Of The Day With Some Musing Added In

The title was on a loop in my brain.  Despite no connection to the premise of the song, it fits as we are figuratively climbing the walls today.  Weather affects the mood like nothing else.  Some skeptics say:

“Naw, your mood is not from the weather. ¬†That seasonal depression stuff is questionable and IF seasonal depression does exist then it really only affects those close to the equator”

Uh ya, I failed geography. ¬†What’s living by the equator got to do with the price of tea in China??? ¬†J-Dub, C’mon girl, get a grip. ¬†Being stuck in this house has really done a number on you.

Rationally I know I am responsible for my mood … me, myself and U. ¬†Uhm, Well I mean I … me, myself and I. ¬†U is a Freudian slip from when I used to blame the world for my problems. ¬†Actually I never blamed the world; I really only ever blame myself.

Anyhoo like boxers in the ring we are ordered by the referee to our respective corners.

CORNER NUMBER ONE

Lulu: nothing personal but I can’t be around people right now. ¬†I am going to be in my room all day.

Me: it’s not personal baby girl unless you make it personal. ¬†We LOVE you.

And this time I am not freaking out. ¬†She needs space … she hasn’t done this all summer. ¬†She forced herself to remain in our company; like a fish in a fishbowl. ¬†I am not going to be fatalist. ¬†Though we are approaching the 3rd anniversary of the terrible awful. ¬†Nope, say it with me, she just needs space.

CORNER NUMBER TWO

Billy Bob¬†pops around the corner … hovering in the doorway …

Me: What?

B: I’m bored sitting in the house

Me: Ya me too but what are we gonna do?  You wanna run around in the rain?

10 minutes later

B: I’m putting on my rain gear and going out to go see what I can do about that tree.

Me: Really? ¬†That’s not even OUR tree. ¬†Is <neighbor’s name> even out there?

B: No but I am just going to look.

Me: Ugh, Well don’t hurt yourself. ¬†All you need is a branch to fall. ¬†Protect your eyes.

B: If it happens, it happens.

That’s a good attitude. ¬†I should take a cue from the mister. ¬†Did I ever mention he went to two therapy sessions after his accident and was CURED! ¬†Yep, therapist told him to say fuck it to everything outside of his control. ¬†He does that and it works! ¬†WTF. ¬†I say fuck it too and then my flipping mind goes into hyper overdrive. ¬†Not fair!

CORNER NUMBER THREE

My cozy corner. ¬†I’m flashing back to the 60s, listening to the Animals and other assorted groups, venturing into the 70s. ¬†Using music to cure what ails me. ¬†Waiting for “normal” to resume.

I hope your day is fairing well.  Still praying for those affected by that bastard Harvey.  As always, more to come.

SYTYCD

No I don’t think I can dance ūüíÉūüŹĽ but I do anyway ūüėā.  Trying to watch episode 10 since my least favorite president interrupted my recording.  All I want do to is watch the last half hour but my PC is not cooperating.  The resolution is blurry and I can’t fast forward.  Real world problems.  Just kidding.  These are champagne problems baby. 

As always more to come.  

Rainy Day Musings

I started blogging in earnest just over a year ago to help me deal with an empty nest. ¬†I’ve always enjoyed reading, writing & arithmetic. ¬†Actually screw arithmetic. Math sucks!@ I’ve always enjoyed reading and writing.

Oh and movies! ¬†I enjoy movies <3. ¬†And music! Music cures what ails me. ¬†And don’t forget the theater!!! But I digress. ¬†From what? ¬†I am musing am I not?

Lately I have asked myself “self, why do you write?”

The answer is complicated.

I jokingly say I write to release the hounds! ¬†And I do … or I did

Until lately where I no longer get the same high

Yes I said high!  There is nothing quite like the feeling of purging your soul from pen onto paper (or keyboard onto blogosphere).  To know you are connecting with someone and making a difference even if only to one other person and even if the impact is minimal.

Though this drug has about run it’s course I fear. ¬†The reaction just isn’t the same. ¬†Change is inevitable and evolve I must but to extinction? Maybe. ¬†Hope not but you know Hope; she is fickle.

As always, more to come.

#SoCS for August 26, 2017 ~ When It Rains It Pours

When I open my inbox every Friday, I am super excited to find The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS.  When you click the link, you will find the rules and all the ping backs.  When you read some all of those ping backs that are nuggets of gold, you will be in awe and amazed, I promise!!  When I make promises, I do not make them lightly.  Go on, click the link.  You know you want to.

When I first wrote “Harvey You Bastard”, I did so from the perspective of how he affected me. ¬†Well, … not just me but Lulu too. ¬†In my defense, Harvey was only a tropical storm and we did not yet know he’d hit as a Category 4 hurricane before becoming a tropical storm again. ¬†Plus I was protecting my chick. ¬†She had one hell of a summer and while all’s well that ends well, she was more than ready to re-start her life.

When she sent me these texts on Wednesday, my heart sank (or is it sunk?). ¬†No time for the grammar po-po. ¬†Move on mind. ¬†Flow stream of consciousness, flow …

When her plans changed, she adapted because …

When life gives you lemons, it’s time to open the gin

When one door closes, another door opens

When it rains, it pours and Harvey is still a bastard

When the going gets tough, the tough get going

When pigs fucking fly, take a picture or no one will believe you

When all is said and done, we know how much worse things could have been

Originally we would have spent last night in a hotel room in Corpus.  Instead, B and I had all our little chickadees in the sometimes empty nest.  Another dinner with the Brain Trust and again lots of laughter.  Our hearts go out to everyone directly impacted by Hurricane Harvey and we are ever so grateful to have been spared from the worst.

As always, more to come.

 

Master Chef

If you haven’t watched last Wednesday’s episode, turn around.  *** Spoiler***

B has conspiracy theories about who will ultimately win and so far his predictions are spot on.  He thinks it’s rigged and it probably is … Christina and Aaron for example had to have planned their chicken and potato dish way in advance. 

I was very happy that Eboni and Cate win! Their recipe will be in Family Circle magazine. 

I was also very happy that Gabriel was saved by Yascheca’s potatoes. He is the youngest contestant. He gave up college to work since his family needed the money.  Pulls at your heart strings.  Of course B called it.  And they kept him.  

Adam and Caitlin in the bottom cook off.  My heart is racing.  Aaaaaaahhhhhh.  And of course I’m crying too ūüė≠ Adam ūüíĒ

Happy National Dog Day

Two Buddys and a Spot. Happy National Dog Day. If this doesn’t make you smile, nuthin will! They’re the reason why I’ll never need blood pressure medication. The BEST stress relievers ever!!! Love my smoosh faces and our neighbor’s smoosh face too ūüôā