Today is rainy while last year on this day it was not. He would have turned 56 not 55. Beyond that, nothing has changed or everything has changed. Weird way your mind interprets past events or just how time works. Gone too soon is the only truth. May the perpetual light shine upon him. One year ago today, I wrote the following for Facebook.
Remembering the dash: January 14, 1961-July 19, 1999. Rest In Peace Brother.
At his service when the Deacon asked if anyone wanted to say anything, I couldn’t. It was too raw. I always regretted not speaking. Yes, he was troubled but I remembered good times, the best of times and his funeral service was the time to talk about them.
I wish I had shared that he walked me to my classroom every day in first grade because I was scared after a traumatic bus ride to Gevers Hall with nuns the year before (that is a funny story for another time). I vividly remember his friends teasing him but he walked me to the door despite that … EVERY single morning.
When my thermos broke and there were shards of glass in my drink and he saw me crying because I was uber sensitive and stuff like that made me cry, he gave me the milk off his lunch tray going without.
How he made me feel comfortable moving to a new home … introducing me to the neighbors … paving the way for friendship since he knew I was painfully shy.
A multitude of more examples flood in. Too many to post. Thankfully they’re forever in my mind.
What a beautiful day it was today! A wonderful day to remember what would have been his 55th birthday. I feel a mixture of both happy & sad. Days like this make me realize what’s important. Pay It Forward. Love your fellow humans. Life is short so make the most of each and every moment while you still can. ❤