How to you define family?

Merriam Webster has multiple definitions but in recent history, the following definition was added:

A group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation 

I chose this more liberal definition instead of the strict definition requiring a bloodline.  I know there are people who will disagree.  Family is blood.  Heritage is important and I get that … really I do … painfully so to the point of exclusion in some cases.  Yet we are bound by so many things …

I have two daughters – one I gave birth to and one by marriage but they are both MY girls. When Pony’s mother in law started calling him son, he asked me if I minded.  He said someone else calling him son felt strange.  I thought his asking me how I felt was super sweet.  I told him of course I didn’t mind … not one single bit and that I was very happy for him.   I even cried happy tears … my son was loved not just by me.

My own experience was quite difference.  I expected to call Billy Bob’s parents mom & dad but was told upon learning of our engagement – well “Don’t start calling me mom, you’ve already got one of those”  Uh, ok … line drawn. I did not understand … growing up I even had parents of friends who I called mom & dad.  What’s in a name?  Everything!

I have always loved quickly, easily and unconditionally.  I love automatically and by extension.  My heart is open; my heart is full.

This makes me very happy but I am also vulnerable; that feelings will not be reciprocated. That somehow it is just too much.  That I feel too much.  I do not like that part … still I would not change a thing … as if I could … I can only try … because it is in my nature … it is who I am.

From Cam in Modern Family ‘I’m sort of like Costco. I’m big, I’m not fancy and I dare you to not like me.”

As always, more to come …

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