Merriam Webster has multiple definitions but in recent history, the following definition was added:
A group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation
I chose this more liberal definition instead of the strict definition requiring a bloodline. I know there are people who will disagree. Family is blood. Heritage is important and I get that … really I do … painfully so to the point of exclusion in some cases. Yet we are bound by so many things …
I have two daughters – one I gave birth to and one by marriage but they are both MY girls. When Pony’s mother in law started calling him son, he asked me if I minded. He said someone else calling him son felt strange. I thought his asking me how I felt was super sweet. I told him of course I didn’t mind … not one single bit and that I was very happy for him. I even cried happy tears … my son was loved not just by me.
My own experience was quite difference. I expected to call Billy Bob’s parents mom & dad but was told upon learning of our engagement – well “Don’t start calling me mom, you’ve already got one of those” Uh, ok … line drawn. I did not understand … growing up I even had parents of friends who I called mom & dad. What’s in a name? Everything!
I have always loved quickly, easily and unconditionally. I love automatically and by extension. My heart is open; my heart is full.
This makes me very happy but I am also vulnerable; that feelings will not be reciprocated. That somehow it is just too much. That I feel too much. I do not like that part … still I would not change a thing … as if I could … I can only try … because it is in my nature … it is who I am.
From Cam in Modern Family ‘I’m sort of like Costco. I’m big, I’m not fancy and I dare you to not like me.”
As always, more to come …
J-Dub's Grin and Bear It 